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rules of romance novels

I read a lot of romances. My first love is historical romance, but I can also be found dipping my toe into the alternate reality genre. I realised recently that one of the things which most intrigues me about reading romances, and what makes me think I might want to try writing them, are those wonderful books which, while acknowledging the genre, at the same time challenge some of its rules and conventions.

While I was discussing this with some non-romance readers, a list of these unwritten rules started to form. Here is my first draft.

The Rules of Romance Novels
followed by [[romance novels which challenge the rules|...and the novels which break or transcend them]]

1. There must be a Happy Ever After ending.

2. The reader should know who the hero and heroine are after the first chapter or two.
2b. Exception to (2) allowed where a clear pool of potential heroes is quickly outlined and the heroine spends the novel choosing between them.

3. The heroine must be chaste, even if the hero has the impression she is not. If not virginal she should be a widow who has slept with no one except former husbands.
3b. Exception to (3) allowed only where the heroine sleeps with the hero before they marry, even if at the time of the sexual encounter they had no plans to marry (e.g. heroine is a prostitute or hero's mistress). However, the hero is the only person with whom she breaks rule 3.

4. The hero's financial status cannot be worse than the heroine's unless his social status is equal to hers or preferably higher.

5. The hero's social status should not be lower than the heroine's by more than a few degrees within the ton or gentry, unless he is a self-made man with a fortune.

6. The hero and heroine must marry.

7. The hero and heroine must not be lazy or indolent. The heroine must not be spiteful or unkind. The hero must have honour, even if it appears tarnished to the outside world.
7b. The heroine must be especially virtuous if ill-used, or in a bad financial or social situation.

8. The hero should usually have sexual experience from previous partners. He should preferably have been a good lover to them: taking their desires into account even if he also paid them.
8b. The hero should not be poxed, however many common prostitutes he has slept with.

9. If the hero or heroine have children from a previous marriage, the children must quickly come to accept and love their new parent.

10. A mother should breast feed even if she would be expected to hire a wet nurse. She should be attentive to her children and not leave their care overmuch to a nurse, nanny or governess.

11. A hero with a habit which is destroying him, in body or in soul (e.g. adultering or alcoholism) must be cured either by the heroine's conscious efforts, or by the power of her love.

12. The heroine should always be rescued, or escape, unsullied before she is subjected to any vile treatment (e.g. rape, or injury) threatened by the villain.